For almost a year now, I haven’t had a job position. Through this transition, it’s challenging for me since I tend to lean towards the thought of “I need to be doing something. I need a title.” Basically, going through the fear of disappointment. Fear of disappointing my family, fear of not pleasing the opinions of others, and fear of disappointing myself. Before, I used to be a university student, then I became a professional, and now, I’m kinda just in a time of resting, waiting on God and walking in faith. It’s a weird season for me, yet it’s been one of the most exciting seasons of my life.
Basically, in the past 2 months, I was able to meet up with different communities in such a short time. Some people whom I grew up with in Venezuela that I hadn’t seen in many years, and people who invested in my life during the time I decided to walk with Jesus as his disciple.
En las noticias se escuchan las tragedias y la desesperación, la crisis humanitaria, política y económica. Estaba de misiones en el mes de enero y de repente un hermano me dice “VENEZUELA ES LIBRE!!!” y yo… “QUE!!??” En ese momento, no tenia acceso a mi teléfono, así que me mostró la noticia sobre el nuevo presidente interino. Entre en mucha duda.
I struggled so much with these words: I don’t fit anywhere.Growing up, I really never found a place or a group of people where I could say “Hey, I belong here.” At home, my parents raised me with Chinese cultural values, biblical values and as far as treating people nicely and with warmth, it was definitely Venezuelan. That Latin American sazón.
In February of 2019, God truly surprised me with the opportunity to go to India! It was so funny, I literally joked with God around two years before doing my DTS in Hong Kong. I was in Barnes and Noble, picking out a beautiful, handmade red journal (which said “made in India”) to use during my missions training, and little did I know, God was going to send our team to India!
All of the YWAM Harbour City staff and DTS students came together, we enjoyed a couple days serving our base, cleaning, decorating and having times of worship. We practiced our dramas and dances over and over.
For so long, I was trying so hard to receive God’s love and approval, when He already loves me completely and He has no high expectations of me, nor He is pointing fingers at me. God is not a distant God. He is relational, personal, and close. So many tears and so many moments to hear His voice during this week.
After a great weekend enjoying company with the girls and also sending off my mom at the bus stop at Tsim Sha Tsui, Jackie and I head back to the base for a new week. The topic for the week was “Worship, Intercession and Hearing God’s Voice.”
Tuesday was officially the day we could move into the student housing. As I settled in, I met two of my other DTS classmates, Melissa from Minnesota and Sophia from Tennessee. During the first night, we were able to bond, talk about our love for food, and about our families. It was truly a great start. I was nervous because I wasn’t sure who I would be living with for the next 6 months! The five of us got along really well and it was just our first night.